Friday, November 04, 2005

The Guys -On Intimacy

"Common sense is genius dressed in its working clothes."
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

The Guys have always defined intimacy differently than the culture. It's not about sex, romance, or even's about honest communication. The willingness to know yourself and be known by the other. And, the willingness to know the other... really. Here's one way they have explained it.

Intimacy is about being willing to know the truth, tell the truth, and then stand there, (meaning wait, ..for however long it takes, wait) while the other person hears your truth and processes it. And then be there ...willing to hear their truth. Then take the time you need to know the truth about what you have heard. Then be willing to tell the truth about that.

* Know your truth...Take the time that you need to think about that.

* Then tell that truth

* Be there and be willing to wait till the other person processes your truth.
That’s a really important step. Give them all the time they need.

* Then really be willing to hear what they believe, ...what their truth is.

And then be willing to do the other thing that’s really hard...
*Take the time that you need to think about it, so you can come to your own truth about their truth.

*Then be willing to tell that.

And it goes back and forth in that way, from one deep truth to another, creating intimacy.


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